Motherhood

Breastfeeding Woes

Breastfeeding. One of the best things you can provide for your newborn comes straight from you. It’s amazing how our bodies can provide. I’ve never really thought about it or did any research on breastfeeding. I’ve just heard that it’s hard but it’s great for your newborn. They say “breast is best” because it can help decrease risks of allergies, SIDS, eczema among other things.  I was, however, worried that I wouldn’t be able to produce enough. Many of my friends have had problems and I, myself am a formula baby for that same reason.

Since pregnancy, I was too busy worrying about my growing baby and the upcoming labor pains that I didn’t do much research on what would happen after baby came home. I was so unprepared for the difficulties of breastfeeding. I knew it was something I wanted to try since it is better for your baby plus it’s free food! But I had no idea what it would do to my body.  I knew I would be spending a lot of time nursing so we purchased a glider for comfort (yes that is a mermaid tail blanket – you gotta breastfeed in style!)

On the one hand, I was lucky because I did not have any trouble producing. I was actually way over-producing that my breasts were always hard like rocks. I was worried of getting mastitis (clogged milk ducts and inflamed breast tissue) but luckily it never got to that. I just had clogged ducts which created lumps under my armpits and if I didn’t breastfeed or pump religiously, I would be extremely uncomfortable. It took almost 6 weeks for my breasts to finally regulate and produce the right amount. I can’t remember how many times I was on the verge of giving up but you really can’t give up either. The only way to stop breast milk from producing is weaning so your body thinks it doesn’t need to make anymore. Plus the sore nipples wasn’t fun but thankfully lanolin cream helped a lot.

Aside from all those discomforts, I’ve been having major acne problems. Growing up, I never had much acne but now it seems uncontrollable and makes me very self conscious. I don’t feel beautiful like I used to because of all the scars I have now. I’m working on getting over it but I was definitely not prepared for this change due to breastfeeding.  This will probably be the only picture I ever share not covering up my pimples, but you can see so much on my chin! Apparently that is a hormonal spot so there’s not much I can do. I’ve been trying different creams but nothing is really helping.

All this to say, I am very thankful I can provide for my baby but the side affects of breastfeeding really hasn’t been pleasant for me.  I do get lots more bonding time with Emmett (especially since he refuses to take a bottle now but that’s for a separate entry) but I’m not sure I’d want to do it again. I also am not looking forward to when I start weaning him off and my breasts will be rock hard and probably have more clogged ducts again. But luckily his smiles keep me going!

Cheers to motherhood!